29.11.10

i just wanna see you smile



I really enjoy spending time with you, even if we're just going to be
 sitting around and talking about nothing.
 There are a million things I love about you, like your nose or the way you 
smile, the way you look me in the eye, too. 
And I just get the greatest feeling when I make you laugh. I feel as if my
 company makes you happy, and that's
what I wish for you. For you to be happy. And when I see you laugh at my
 clumsy ways, it just makes me want to spend 
the rest of my life with you so I can see a smile on your face.

23.11.10

who died & made you king of anything.

there's a guy out there who's going to be really
happy that you didn't get back together
with your crappy ex-boyfriend.
At this age, the worst thing you can do to yourself is fall for someone harder than they fall for you.
take time to listen to your heart. sometimes you need not to ask yourself who you really love most, but ask yourself who really makes you happy and who makes you feel loved

There are two ways to get everyone to hate you.
Either do something really wrong, or do something really right.

it's nice to know that even when lots of girls are crazy about you, you can still smile at me.
I hope I see the good in you come back again, I just believe in you.
In love, the past is not important, but the present. Experience is more relevant than the pain you went through. The only thing that will make it stronger is forgiveness and not the retorting of sin.
Why did I do it? I guess because I was sick of you running in and out of my life without some kind of consequence. So here is your close line babe, I hope the fall hurts like hell.
don’t ask yourself what the world needs;
ask yourself what makes you come alive.
and then go and do that…
because what the world needs is people who are alive.
You call me up late, I never pick up. You ain't my man, you're only my jump.
but now it's impossible to even start a decent conversation with you. you can't deny it, things have changed. we've grown apart and you have to face the fact that i'll no longer be there every single time you need me. the truth is what it is and that is i don't have anymore respect for you as an individual now. you're just another face in the crowd
Some of the most interesting friendships are between people who are attracted to each other, but can't act on it.

so when i come out alive from all of this,
i'll look back and realize you've changed me.
and that's something i can thank you for one day.

You are going to lose people in your life. & I realize that no matter how much time you spent with them, or how much you appreciated them and told them so, it will never seem like it was enough.
Everyone in the world could be screaming at me, telling me that I could do better and I wouldn't care. I would stick my middle finger high in the air while my other hand was holding yours.
And I’d be lying if I told you I never knew it was coming. But I’m tired of lying and I’m sick of trying. We both know it wasn’t worth it, I need to hear it, and you need to say it.
You keep telling me to be glad for what we had while we had it. That the brightest flame burns quickest. Which means you saw us as a candle. And I saw us as the sun.
Don't believe him if he comes back and says he misses you. Remember, he chose not to be with you.
 I don't know how much longer I can take this. You run through my mind like there's no tomorrow, I don't know when there's a second when I'm not thinking about you. it's like your haunting me or something and the worst part is you're not even mine

Just when you think things
Can't get any worse, they do.
But I've learned that life is
Like an hourglass.
Sooner or later everything hits rock bottomBut all you have to do is be patient
And wait for someone to turn it all around

Do you ever sit and think.. what if? What if you never said the first hello? What if our paths never crossed? What if you kept your mouth shut and just let things pass, or what if you would have said just one more thing? What if you had five more minutes? What if you could turn back time or make it all just stand still? What if you could say I love you one more time or NEVER had said it at all? Where would your life be?
You can’t do this. You can’t put one relationship on hold for another. It’s like call waiting… you leave one person on hold long enough, and they are gonna hang up.
it's important to scare yourself, to do things you don't think you're capable of doing
 I just hope one day you see me, and your heart stops, and you realize what you could’ve had this whole time.
Don't ever think I chose to leave because I wanted to; I didn't. It was more like I needed to. We were killing each other.
Some people can just move on, you know. They mourn and cry and then they're done with it, or at least appear to be. But to me, I don't know. I didn't want to fix it; I didn't want to forget it. It wasn't something that was broken, it was just something that happened. And I'm finding ways, every day, of working around it. I'm respecting and remembering it, but I'm getting along with my life at the same time.
No smile is more beautiful than the one
that has struggled through the tears.

mostly, the ones who leave the biggest impact on
your lives, stay for the shortest time.


just because i'm here for you all the time
doesn't mean you can take me for granted.


music speaks what cannot be expressed…
soothes the mind and gives it rest,
heals the heart and makes it whole,
flows from heaven to the soul.

You could lose your pride, lose your patience, lose your mind. But whatever you do, don't lose hope.
Throw away your problems and smile because honey, this is the only life you've got and your problems won't matter when you're dead
The key to change... is to let go of fear.
Most of the time, they say that you are fortunate if there is someone beside you, holding your hands, kissing you, hugging you and loving you. But not all people in a relationship are happy. Behind those displays of affection are pain, tears, blame and fears, coldness, loneliness and confusions, depressions. Singles are luckier. They have only themselves to worry about. Less expense, less stress, less mess
Life will knock you down more times than you can possibly imagine. Don’t knock yourself down.
Contrary to what the cynics say, distance is not for the fearful. It's for the bold. It's for those willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It's for those knowing a good thing when they see it. Even if they don't see it nearly enough.
Remember that everyone you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something.
We're all a little weird, and when we find those people whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness and call them our best friends.
I guess the reason I think I'm nothing is because no one's ever fought for me. I believe if I was truly worth it, that somewhere along this road, someone would've fought for me to stay, but instead, I always wound up walking away.
You're an asshole. But I think I'm getting used to you. I like that fact that you talk incessantly. I got a thing for assholes who tell good stories. I think that drinking is the only think you can do right. You're gonnaself-destruct. I think that's what I like.
I was just saying that sometimes our relationship seems so simple and easy. But no matter what, it just turns into a big mess. And there are days that I want to dive into that mess, but then, other days, I can’t help but wonder if maybe we’re just two people who don’t work as a couple. -Brooke Davis; One Tree Hill.
You can stay up all night and still not count all the ways to lose the people you love -My Sisters Keepe
Serious relationships are not something anyone should really be actively looking for because sometimes, the best relationships happen only by accident. I was beginning to see, though, that the unknown wasn’t always the greatest thing to fear. The people who know you best can be riskier, the words they say and the things they think have the potential to be not only scary but true, as well.
She said, "Do you know what it's like to lose your other half? To be so sad that, when you finally have a reason to smile, it doesn't feel natural anymore?" 
So no, you wait for a spark, you know it will turn you on. He's gonna make you feel the way you want to feel. When he starts to lie, when he makes you cry, you know I'll be there. My day will come. I know someday I'll be the only one. 
The details are the life of it. I insist, say everything on your mind. Don't hold back. Don't analyse or anything as you go along. Say it out. 
I'm not the type of girl that would just get up & leave you, 'cause unlike them other girls; baby, I need you. 
But you love someone else. But you want to be with someone else. & I can't believehow dumb I sound. & I will put my face over the ground & love you. 
Does it hurt when you see how I've done without you? Thought that I couldn't belong. Never thought that you could be so cruel. All you need is some friends, won't be by yourself. Let's go round. 
Goodbye is the absolute hardest thing to say because you have to walk away with just a memory; & memories, they fade

16.11.10

most importantly

All the ways you wish you could be, 
that's me. I look like you wanna look,
I fuck like you wanna fuck, I am smart, capable,
and most importantly, I am free in all
the ways that you are not. 
++ Fight Club

15.11.10

Wrote this poem. Corny, but I like it.

I don't want you back, that's not it at all.
I hate that you are still in my head.
I hate that you made me fall.

It's head over heels, and mind over matter.
To let go or move on?
I'm guessing the latter.

It's been awhile since we last spoke.
Longer since I saw you.
I wish this was a joke.

I know that you will always have my heart.
And always be apart of me.
I knew that from the start.

It's really over, as hard as that is to say.
I hope that one day I can move on.
Somehow, and some way.

Quotes & Pictures, my favorites so far.

Unless it is mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it is a waste of time. 
There are too many mediocre things in life. Love should not be one of them.
 Women wish to be loved not because they are pretty, or good, 
or well bred, or graceful, or intelligent, but because they are themselves.
 the best feeling in the world is the one you can't describe
 Even though we've changed and we're all finding our own place in the world, we all know that when the tears fall or the smile spreads across our face, we'll come to each other because no matter where this crazy world takes us, nothing will ever change so much to the point where we're not all still friends
 For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for 
everything you gain, you lose something else.
 Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.
 Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, determination, and dedication. Remember all things are possible for those who believe.
 People don't really want the truth, they just want good news.
 Sometimes you just need to cry and be sad. You need to break down and be torn apart. You need to learn how to pick yourself up and put yourself back together. Sometimes, the only way to be happy is to give into sadness first. Cause without sadness, there's no happiness, you would never learn to smile.
 love is everything it's cracked up to be. it really is worth fighting for, 
being brave for, risking everything for, and the trouble is if you don't risk 
anything, you risk even more
Nothing is certain anymore. I don't know what in the world is the right thing to do, and so I'm stuck here in a place I don't want to be. I don't want to sit back and watch you be fine without me. I don't want to cry and carry on like I have been doing for the past month. I just want not to want you anymore. I want to, hell I need to, just move on.
She's been wrong, she's been lied to. She's been deceived and she's been used over and over again; but this is the last straw. Your luck's run out, your “sorrys” don't mean a thing. She's over your apologizes, she's tired of your games. She's going to do what's best for her, she now knows the truth. That's why this time, she's walking out on you.
I guess it's just hard talking to you when you were once my everything. I depended on you & you let me down. It's hard to talk to you when every time we do, I feel mad at you. I guess we'll just have to see where live takes us. Maybe we're meant to never talk again, maybe we're meant to be friends, or maybe we're meant to be together. We'll just have to wait and see.
Don't let him tell you you're not worth it. You're amazing, you're beautiful. And you could love him more than anyone else could. And if he can't see that this is a once in a lifetime chance, he's just not worth it.
We all have that boy. That boy who you're completely over, but you still think about before you sleep. That boy who you avoid talking to, but still wish he would talk to you just once. That boy who you have to make yourself not think about, but always wonder if he is thinking about you.
You want to know what makes me love you more than I loved him? It's because when he got me, I was perfectly unused, I was fearless and not to mention - a hopeless romantic. When you got me, I was already bruised and battered, I was hurting and I was afraid of the world. I was cynical about love, and yet despite all of this, you never leave.
I planned to say all these terrible things to you, but in the end, I just want to tell you I miss you. There was never a moment I tried to remember you, because there was never a moment I forgot you.
It's so weird. You're so different from all the others I have liked. We barely know each other and I freak out if you even say a word to me. It seems so unreal for us to be together, yet for some reason I can picture us together: talking, laughing, and taking crazy pictures. As much as I want to give up sometimes, I keep on trying because something in my gut tells me that we are meant to be, and that one day, it just might happen.
Even though you are a liar, if you told me right now that you loved me and that you were sorry, I would believe you.
I’ve been the rebound, the challenge, the fall back, and the girlfriend. I’ve been the mistake and the correction. One day someone will love me for what I’ve been and what I am, where I’ve been and where I am. One day, someone will love me for me. So love me cause you can, not because you should.
it's like a weight has been lifted, i can finally breathe. not worry about what he will say, or when he would've finally stopped ignoring me. because now i no longer care. he doesn't concern me. i just wonder if he'll come back to me someday wishing he never screwed things up.but if this is the way it was meant to be,then i'm honestly okay with that. this time, i'm okay.i've realized it's not boys who make or break you, it's only you who decides. so no matter what happens, i'll be just fine. i've already got all that i need.
Stop saying you're sorry. You wanna know something? I knew. I knew you didn't feel
that way about me. I knew, and I still let it happen. Because, well, I figured that one
 night with you was better than never. So, will you stop saying you're sorry?
Because you didn't know better, but I did.
he said "i didn't mean to break your heart,-"
and before he could finish she replied with
"i didn't mean to fall in love either, but
we all make mistakes."
Guys think of you as a video game. They play you and keep beating levels. But, if they get mad at the game, they yell & scream at it, then eventually turn it off if it isn't going their way. And when they finally finish the game & beat the last level, they get bored and don't want to play the game again, because there's nothing new left to do, nothing new to learn. Guys don't like a game that's easy to beat; they want a challenge. Just one that's not hard enough to run down their ego.
One day you're going to want that specific girl.  That girl that knew she wasn't perfect,  but tried to be for you.  That girl who wanted nothing more than to be there for you and love you the only way she knew she could.
That girl who sees your flaws, but values them as much as your strengths.  That girl who still can't bring herself to hate you, even though you probably deserve it
 sometimes i wish i had never met you. because then i could go to
 sleep at night not knowing there was someone like you out there.
Your friends are your release; they're who you have the most fun with. And yet when the going gets tough, those people turn around and suddenly, they're not just making you laugh. They're being this rock and giving you all their advice, even though you're so much your own person. If you dissect yourself, I guarantee you, your friends are in there. Their influence is incredible. They're the people whom you need most in your life.      
Find the one you can be yourself in front of. Someone that you can share anything with; like a best friend. It's when you can't even imagine what your life would be like without that other person and even though it doesn't make sense to other people, you know that you're meant to be together.
I just hope one day you see me, and your heart stops, and you realize what you could’ve had this whole time.

I don't want him to be perfect. I want him to laugh at me, trip me, then help me back up. Pick me up and throw me into the pool, make me watch hours of football & take me to the arcade and beat me at air hockey. But most of all, I want him to love me for who I am.
 You looked at me and said, "Do you ever feel like you're working for something you're never going to get? A shoot and miss kind of deal. Like, no matter what, you can't have it. But that makes you fight for it just a little more?" I looked at him, stared for a second, and replied "Every day."
I wish there was some way  to make you know how much you hurt me. I hope you’re sorry, but if not, I hope one day you realize what you did to me.
He talked to her again, as friends. 
It's been a while, but his eyes were just as blue and his smile was just as bright as always. 
He made her smile, he made her fall in love, again.
and if all those words you said to me actually meant something, maybe we wouldn't be standing where we are today.
don't talk to me because you havent had any luck finding another girl to replace me.you pushed me away remember? i wanted us to work so badly but you clearly couldn't care. i'm not going to be here when you want back in, because this time baby your going to be the one who gets walked away from.
honey, i wish you the best finding someone that will put up with all your shit.